Monday, August 02, 2010

Can't Spell South Without The "Tea"

I recently wrote a blog about the ubiquitousness of Tea in England. Not that I tested this, but I wouldn't be surprised if one could order a cup of tea at a chicken fight in England. The hard part would be finding the chicken fight. Once found however, no one would blink as you put 20 on the fowl in red and ordered an English Breakfast, heavy on the sugar.

I was initially comparing the acquisition of tea in England to the same conquest in New York or Los Angeles. Tea time in the South though is about as frequent as Haley's Comet sightings. I never knew how good I had it in La La Land. I was in Oklahoma and almost all of my tea requests were met with a confused look. As if I had actually inquired about a chicken fight.

I could not even get tea in Mcdonalds...during breakfast! I found them not carrying tea to be egregious. I found them acting like I was the weird one to expect them to carry tea to be down right silly. You serve coffee so the ability to heat water is in place. Now dip some leaves in that hot water instead of coffee beans. See Mcdonalds in Oklahoma, That wasn't hard now was it?

The profit margin on tea must be astronomical. Up to 2 dollars a cup?! I can buy a garbage bag full of tea bags for a dollar. Every cup they would sell would basically pay for all their tea inventory. I think that math precipitates all food establishments keeping a box of tea around for the occasional non-coffee warm beverage seeker.

After some thought, a more sinister explanation for my tea woes came into focus. Maybe the places carry tea but my servers were either too lazy or judgmental to whip me up a cup. Whatever the case I know I'm not weird or difficult when a country with a currency way stronger than ours chooses tea as their national drink. Cheers mate...sip...sip.

1 comment:

me! said...

While Brooklyn-to-L.A. might have been culture shock, coastal-to-flyover is taking it to a different level altogether.

A few quick pointers:

When you think of this part of the country, you've got to parse it a little finer than "The South," because there are actually a few different regions, and they have different implications for tea.

The Southeast (a.k.a., "Deep South") is hardcore iced tea territory, with a heavy emphasis on "sweet tea."

Texas (with the possible exception of the eastern portion) should generally be thought of as part of the "Southwest." We've still got iced tea, but we borrowed the sweet tea concept for the most part from the Southeast, an outcome of natural beverage migratory patterns.

Hot tea is served grudgingly here, as it is generally just too darn hot to pay it much attention. Iced tea is the strongly preferred beverage.

Oklahoma (from whence I hail) is not really Deep South and not quite Southwest. The northwest part of the state is really kind of Midwest, while the eastern part is more Southern, but not quite Deep South, at least until you get into the Ozark foothills.

Additionally, the late arrival of Oklahoma to the statehood scene (it was "Indian Territory" until 1889, well after the end of the Civil War) throws a huge wrench in its standing as part of the Deep South. It's a bit more frontier in its history.

So Oklahoma is going to be a bit confused in the tea department.

Were you in Tulsa or OKC? I assume this was business, and I hope it went well.