Air Plain Blues

It’s hard to be original on any airplane topic so this blog entry will just have to fall short on originality. I just got off a plane and once again I was sitting on the side with absolutely no view. I fly into NYC once a month but somehow I see Manhattan from the sky once every 2 years.

Pilot: If you look out on the left side of the airplane you’ll see Jesus and Santa Claus on a sleigh being powered by flying reindeer...well that or the grace of God (chuckle, chuckle)

Pilot: And for those of you on the right side, Dwayne’s side. If you look closely into your window, and don’t breath out too hard, you may be able to see your own reflection.

Hunger for the Arts

I recently went to the Metropolitan Museum of Art in NYC. I don’t know why but I always seem to go to museums on a completely empty, haven’t eaten in six hours, stomach. It makes for interesting viewing. It’s hard to focus or enjoy anything because you can hardly stand-up. And forget about reading the little plaques next to the art works. My friend couldn’t understand why I spent 20 minutes looking at a painting of a woman holding a sandwich. She’s all “That’s not even a part of the exhibit! It’s just a sign for the cafeteria.” And I’m all “Let’s check out what fine art they have in the Cafeteria.” The answer, of course, was none and the more devastating news...the cafeteria was closed.

“That guy must really be moved by Van Gogh’s work...look, he fainted!”