Monday, April 19, 2010

Rap Music Make Me Violent

Well, not exactly but it does get me amped. I'm not suggesting we censor rap or anything but we should be mindful. Words are powerful. Words spoken over a beat by someone with charisma and swagger are potent. I recently quoted Notorious B.I.G. in a blog. To make sure I had the quote right I youtubed “Who Shot Ya?”. I was instantly transported to Brooklyn, mid nineties. As soon as I heard the beat with the “As we proceed...” I was amped. I was sitting in Starbucks chomping on a Reduced Fat Turkey Bacon with Egg White sandwich and I was charged. Luckily I didn't have my good headphones that encase my ears. Surely the sounds pumping through those headphones would have resulted in me punching the man sitting at the table next to me.

It was 8am and I wanted to get a mosh pit going. Biggie's voice on that track is so hard. It taps directly into the riotous section of your brain. Have you ever been at a party when “I Ain't Never Scared” comes on? Or an early nineties party when Onyx's “Slam” came on? It's like you wanna punch someone. Hell, you don't even mind getting punched.

Have you ever tried to write a quirky blog while listening to Biggie. It's a tall order. To get through my blog I had to change songs. I put on some Michael Buble to bring me down. Well, I had to finish my blog and plus it wasn't cool to be feeling so aggressive in a Starbucks in Eagle Rock, California at 8am.

There's no denying Rap is influential. If Rap can have such an instant effect on a methodical philosopher such as myself, I shudder to think what it can do to impulsive or impressionable minds.

It's powerful stuff. Anytime you can make a room full of women rub themselves...and it be know you're dealing with something crazy.

For me, I can translate the literal words of rap into my own mental discourse. So “throw your guns in the air” is pure energy. And that energy fills me but I don't take the advice literally. For me “throw your guns in the air” means “let your elf go and tap into your raw energy and let it propel you into a higher strata.” But what percentage of people do this internal editing? And, is it the inappropriateness of their words t o begin with that makes people get hyped? Could Biggie's voice rapping about love or American History make me Head Butt people in Starbucks?

I guess I'll leave that question to the experts...assuming that they are some out there.

Friday, April 16, 2010

I Can Hear Sweat Trickling Down Your Cheek

So, as my faithful readers know, I'm in week 3 of the P90X workout program. It feels like a fraternity with P90 folks sharing a bond forged in sweat affectionately called "X" by us in the fraternal order.

I don't usually take to groups. I write my blog alone. I stand on stage alone. I fight crime...alone. But for some reason I've instantly taken to being a member of the P90X family. It's like the end of Antwoine golly, I DO have a family.

So I decided to do my P90 workout at the gym yesterday. The whole point of P90 is to do it at home but this routine has a lot of jumping and I didn't want to disturb the elderly woman who lives below me during her soaps and daytime Judge shows. She might even get the idea to take me on Judge Mathis. Definitely, a slam dunk case in her favor.

As fate would have it, as I jumped, lunged and squatted in the empty class studio, there was a personal trainer meeting in the spin cycle class right next to the room I was in. All separated my glass walls. I noticed the trainers noticing me, their faces conveying concern, annoyance, jealousy, panic and intrigue all at once. It must have been the same look the people who owned the telegraph companies had when they saw the telephone...uh-oh. Here was a guy getting in an incredible workout with no machines, no equipment and no trainer. Looking on as I kicked major “X”, those trainers must have felt like a pair of acid washed jeans in 1989. Like the end is near.

I had a mind to peek my head into their meeting and say...The future is now! Don't be mad, UPS is hiring.

For the record though I think personal trainers still provide a great and needed service. And P90X is really for people who are either already in shape or highly motivated to get in shape. But nothing motivates as good as a live coach. Even the most elite and driven athletes need coaches to push them. So don't panic trainers. I still love you and it was my work with my good friend Kordo that made me P90X ready in the first place.

But seeing a room full of buffed worried guys was way cool.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

You Oughta Be in Pictures

Have you ever gone into a place of business and seen head shots on the wall? Now, have you ever noticed anyone of the people in those head shots? My recognition percentage has to be less than 10% and I'm in show business. It's like the wall of your local dry cleaner is in fact a graveyard of sorts. A resting place for pictures of people whose careers never took off. To put in in perspective though, most people's show business careers never “take-off” The average income for actors in SAG is $5000/year. And that's after you factor in the millions the top ten get per year for their movies.

My question is what does a picture of someone that customers don't know do for a business.

CUSTOMER: I had doubts but now that I see Tony Carrington The Third aka Cop # 3 in Dog Day Afternoon shops here...I guess I will too.

If you happen to take your car to Prestige Auto in Encino, CA you will see the picture of a young, up and coming Comedian named Dwayne Perkins. The only mechanic I trust, Sako, asked me for the picture. I whole-heartedly endorse Sako and Prestige Automotive. I unequivocally stand by their work. But what does that do for someone already there to get their car fixed? Maybe my picture should be on their website or next to their add in the Yellow Pages. (People under 20 should ask their Moms what the Yellow Pages were :-)

I cringe every time I see the picture and I cringe even tighter when I see my, “witty when I wrote it”, caption on the pic with a purple Sharpee.

I plan on keeping my head shot in businesses count at 1. So if you need a Dwayne fix check out my blogs or head to Prestige Automotive in Encino, California.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

After Before

So I recently started doing the P90X workout routine. I was a fan of the infomercial but was resigned to watching the commercial and picking up a few moves. So my workout was P90X inspired. But Santa Claus was very good to me on my birthday. What? You thought Santa only delivered on Christmas. Perhaps you're not on the “really nice” list. This year Santa got me a Sony E-reader and the P90X workout set. Apparently Santa wants me to be a well read Adonis. Challenge accepted.
Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to take your body through a complete metamorphosis:
I accept but here's the problem, and this doesn't come from my Brooklyn tendency to brag... I'm not a good before picture. It's like I'm on day 30 already. A fact that I'm proud of but they won't use the testimony of a guy who got a little better. I thought about letting myself go for a month to make a better before picture but my vanity wouldn't let me get like that and then take pictures of it to boot.
I've made the mistake of telling people I'm doing P90X. A mistake amplified now that I'm telling the whole Blog-o-Sphere. So now the pressure is on for me to become an action figure. So long bread. I love bread so it's questionable if I'll be able to really get ripped. My close friends have already said they think my body won't change.
But I can't go out like a sucker. I'll just have to get used to being slightly hungry all the time. I'm sure people in third world countries don't eat til they have to loosen their belts while triumphantly rubbing their bellies.
On perk is now I can workout in my boxer briefs. Laundry was dominating my life, well sorta. Now I can workout at home like an action movie villain with no shirt on while wearing my blue tooth...10, 11, 12, have you taken care of our little friend...
I've always wanted to be in action hero shape goes nothing.

Thursday, April 08, 2010

Ye Olde Towne Clock

I recently shot an independent movie in a cemetery. I wrote a blog about it, like to hear it? Here it goes, “Rest In Plush.” The cemetery was more like a park, well kept, lush and breezy. A real mystery as there was no breeze outside the cemetery. Not sure if the breeze was a product of the design of the cemetery or if they have giant fans on either end set to “picnic” speed.

Whatever the case this place made my heart rate drop 10 beats. Serenity right now. The kicker? They have a clock tower on the grounds that chimed on the hour and politely hiccuped on the 15,30 and 45 minute mark. Not only was it peaceful but quite helpful. I think the reminders could really help people better sort out their time. Imagine jumping on Facebook and telling yourself you will only be a few minutes, two dings later and you realize it's been over half an hour. Time to stop Farmville and get something done. I personally don't need this as my internal clock keeps better time than the clock in the dashboard of my Saturn Ion. But for the rest of you folks with internal clocks not synced with the Official NIST Atomic Clock, wouldn't some friendly time cues be helpful?

I propose we install huge town clocks in America's biggest and busiest cities. Imagine a dong resonating all through New York City letting all 10 million people know it's 1 O'Clock. Even people in up in Poughkeepsie would hear a faint noise and put some pep in their step. The goal is that everyone would always know the time within 15 minutes. This could even help sort out domestic disagreements...Baby I lasted 3 dongs. What more could you want?...How about one dong but make it good!

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Rest In Plush

I recently acted in a funeral scene in an indie movie that was shot at The Hollywood Forever Cemetery. This cemetery is stunning. Most cemeteries are serene. It falls in line with the whole rest in peace thing. But the people in this cemetery are not only resting in peace they are resting in lavishness. I've never seen such elaborate tombstones. Not that I frequent cemeteries or have a large enough sample set to make my case. But that's never stopped me in the past. Besides, my gut tells me the kind of coin it took to make some of the graveyard displays (calling them tombstones would be a disservice) could make a handsome down payment on a house. Many of the pieces had pictures of the departed on them reminiscent of the pictures you see of the writers in newspapers. Not that anyone reads newspapers.

The Hollywood Cemetery is the resting place of many old school legendary Hollywood greats. So I don't have a problem with it having an allure. It would have that without the eye grabbing displays. But this final resting place seemed to have the exact social dynamics of a night club: Invite a few famous people and watch everyone and their brother flock. draped in their best and trying to impress while “fitting” in with the people we've deemed stars.

But the problem it seems, even in death, is that those “famous” people typically have something that separates them that can't be bought. A look, a talent, a mystique that all the bottles of Moet in the world can't capture. Sadly, this cemetery seemed to have a few amazing Hollywood standouts surrounded by people looking over the velvet ropes trying to gain access, not to heaven, but to the heavenly VIP section.

Of course no disrespect to the fallen people or their loved ones. And I truly think all you could ever want is to be love and be loved at some point during the ride. And I'm sure someone loved every person resting there. And if those remaining find some solace in burying a loved one in style, I have no problem with that. I just want to highlight that that love they had trumps any display or the prestige of the place where the empty vessel may rest.