Thursday, May 12, 2005

Suction Function

My dentist tells his assistant to put water in my mouth. She puts a tiny hose in my mouth and the stream of water begins to flow. Ten seconds later he tells her to add suction. So she puts a little vacuum tube in my mouth that begins to suck out the water. Well what is it Doc? Does my mouth need to be wet or dry. Or have you not used your toys in a while? So I’m breathing through my nose while I’ve got the conundrum happening in my mouth. I guess the dentist needed more light because he lifted my upper lip. This blocked my nostrils and forced me to play the hit game show that’s sweeping the country...”How long can you hold your breath” Well, at least for a minute and a half thank you very much. Tell him what he’s won Bob.

1 comment:

Batman said...

i challenge anyone to find ONE logical thing a dentist does during an exam.

from first atacking you with a shiny metal hook as you read on the wall 'don't use any sharp objects' on one of his posters about self-cleaning.

then he tells damn dude, your gums are bleedin and that's not good. or normal. healthy gums can obviously take being stabbed multiple times without any bloodletting of any kind.

then he'll take x-rays, during which he'll make sure he's not even in the goddamn room as the camera is placed point blank AGAINST or INTO your face.

then to FILL a cavity, he then says he has to DRILL INTO YOUR TEETH.

best racket ever.